My story

 

My walk with God has been rocky. I always believed in him and thought there were many paths to him. It isn't till recently that It really sunk in the truth. But before I get to that let me start from the beginning.

I grew up in a christian household. I went to church every weekend. I was sometimes not really present even though my body was there. I got distracted and thought about other things. However, I started days with a devotion, and we would start our day with prayer. Before my dad would drop me off at school we would say a prayer in the car. I think around 2004 time frame I stopped going to church and disconnected from it. My beliefs in a creator never stopped but I just did not practice my faith.It all just got buried.

In Between 2004-2007 I ventured on the net and started and got introduced to new age ideas. Someone suggested to me that I might be an indigo which is a type of person and is based on new age teachings. Then in 2007 I had a health crisis. It kinda led me to do something again. I went back to church for a while and then that fell. During the time I remember I have revelations that I should be vegan for one (I will make a separate post on this). I got other thoughts that brought me back to my faith. I remember at the time getting in the car and making a trip to the church that I grew up in bookstore. I grew up in the Seventh Day Adventist church and we have our own bookstore and I got books, devotions, etc. During my time healing from my crises I read some books and tried to anchor myself in God. I healed from that and unfortunately I fell again out of my faith. Then about in 2012-2013 time frame I came back to new age teachings and I fell into the trap of following the teachings. I truly believed there was another way to him. I believed in the ideas that lurked around those teachings and really got involved with them. I followed one teacher in particular but God did not stop seeking her. In 2017 she had an awakening and that led her to being baptized and living a life for Jesus she is now Christian and has denounced her teachings. Also when I was at a vigil that I used to be part of in animal rights there was this guy that was at one of our vigils that was spreading word of Jesus. It kind of clicked in my brain that God was calling me, and has been doing for a real long time. Most of the times it is subtle but it's there. Around the same time too I had a health crisis mentally and all the teachings that I learned started to creep on me and I got very fearful. I was freaking out because I thought that I was going to die and then be reincarnated as a pig and be slaughtered. Those thoughts really really disturbed me but I thought they were true. I also was so fearful that I was going to die. Went to the hospital and saw some people that got me into a program but also got me some meds to help with the crises I was having. But I really have to say Jeremiah 29:11 and 2 Timothy 1:7 is what helped me though the dark times. God's words helped me in my darkness. Later in 2017 I started venturing on more christian books and readings and In late 2017 I made the decision that in 2018 I was going to read the Bible from cover to cover. So much in there that my dad taught me but I did not listen and thought he was speaking out of opinions and not Biblical facts. Like how witchcraft and such is an abomination to our heavenly father. I also read that Jesus is the only truth. Jesus answered him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life; no one goes to the Father except by me. John 14:6

I heavily regret getting involved with new age but one thing is clear God has not stopped pursuing me. He wants us to repent of our sins and turn away from them. I am not perfect by any means. I do feel like I have a relationship with him now but it's just beginning. I also have to say I started a new practise I write to God in what I call my God Journal. In my God journal I tell him my worries, my fears, my hopes, my joys, etc. I finish my entries as if it is a prayer because well it is. I know I need to work on my prayer life and that also is a work in progress.

Using a site to read the Bible from beginning to end just became a habit and now I can't start my day without reading a devotion and also a chapter in the Bible. I do not  consider myself to be a Seventh Day Adventist. I for a while was calling myself christian and in ways I am but I recently have changed it to be a follower of Christ because I know there are lots of bad thoughts and feelings towards the term christian. I truly inspire to be like Jesus and to live a life more like how he did. I follow his teachings and do my best to live a life in his footsteps. I am not anywhere close but I thank him for dying on the cross for my sins. It's an incredible gift, one that is free but is rejected by many. I will also make another post later on this topic.